Friday, September 9, 2011

You asked for it

Well, somebody asked for an update, so here it is, in all it's glory.

It would appear that our entering into an FLW was just another, fruitless attempt to try and save our marriage without actually dealing with underlying issues.

What's the point of trying something like this, when your husband has a wandering everything? I require honesty, loyalty, dedication, commitment, HONESTY, follow-through, and..did I mention...honesty?

Lies, secrets, deception, broken promises.... these are not conducive to a FLM, wouldn't you agree?

Honestly, I think he just wanted somebody to take charge so that he wouldn't have to deal with the hassles of running a household, making decisions, etc. So that he could just live in his blissful world, doing what's expected of him (in terms of chores) when he's home, and doing whatever he wants with whomever he wants when he's not at home.

So, no D/s play, no "FLM" in the way that you'd expect. Instead, it's the same as it ever was. I'm responsible for everything, nothing gets done unless I say it gets done, it's always been that way - only there's really nothing in it for me. I manage all the finances (and quite honestly, after what he did the last time he was in charge of the finances, it's better that way), I manage the household, I do most of the chores, all the decisions are left up to me... but I'm not getting spoiled, respected, laid, or attended to in any way, shape or form.

It's like I have another son. "Tell mom what you want her to hear" but then live your life however you see fit when Mommy's not looking.

So... sorry there hasn't been any updates, but there's really not been anything worth saying.

I just feel that an FLM is not worth the effort, when only one person is willing to play by the rules, and make a consistent effort. AND - I just don't think you can have an FLM if you don't have trust. And there is no trust.